You can tell me I’m flippant… Tell me I’m not even hurting… Tell me it meant nothing… Tell me I don’t even care…
Just because I choose to smile doesn’t mean I’m not torn apart on the inside… I’m just trying my best to find happiness.
September 2011
August 2011
Secret: I whisper sweet nothings to my shower head in the mornings so it doesn’t fall on me.
I knew things would change and keep changing, so many times, in the few months that I would be here… I knew by the time I came home, all the dynamics of everyone I knew or met here would be different.
But I don’t like change.
I refused to admit the inevitable.
Day 1: Ten random facts about yourself.
Day 2: Nine things you do every day.
Day 3: Eight things that annoy you.
Day 4: Seven fears/phobias.
Day 5: Six songs that you’re addicted to.
Day 6: Five things you can’t live without.
Day 7: Four memories you won’t forget.
Day 8: Three words you can’t go a day without using.
Day 9: Two things you wish you could do.
Day 10: One person you can trust
because it gives me something to look forward to every day….
I’ll start tonight.
- Girl: How come my boyfriend hasn't kissed me even though we've been going for almost five months?
- John: Wait, going? Going where? Certainly not to first base! Anybody? Eh? Base jokes? ...is that still a thing?
La Dispute - Nine
I recall once on the church steps,
When I moved to kiss your chest,
How we paid such close attention
To each sweet and stuttered breath,
I should’ve stopped to paint our picture,
Captured honest pure affection,
Just to document the difference
between attraction and connection.
I can see all of my friends and
I break into empty buildings,
When the coast was clear,
With backpacks full of beer,
We’d throw our bottles from the rooftops
At this city-it looked endless.
Guess I still don’t see the difference
between real purpose and that urgent adolescence.
And I remember in a basement sharing sweat
With all these stranger boys and girls,
“We’ll change the world!” We sang,
“We’ll change the world!” But,
Nothing seems to change and
They say none of them will listen,
But I still see much more power in that basement
than in elected politicians.
And if we get beaten by this winter,
If we get strangled by regret, just
Let our love of life and tension
Gasp in sweet and stuttered breaths, and
Have them lay us in a basement,
Smash some bottles on the ground, and
Say we never knew the difference
between the feeling and the sound.
Remember not our faulty pieces,
Remember not our rusted parts,
It’s not the petty imperfections that define us but
The way we hold our hearts,
And the way we hold our heads,
I hope they write your names beside mine
on my gravestone when I’m dead.
And when we’re dead let our voices carry on
To find a better song.
To find a better song and sing along
I don’t know what this is from….. But I love it.
And I’m just sitting there like
WE GOT THE CAR BACK TODAY! hahaha :)
